“Prepare for the Smolder”

And dancing?  He loves to dance, or bounce.  Whenever he hears music he’s just gotta busta move.

These are the little moments I don’t want to forget:

Last week, one of my girls, came into our room just before school the other morning telling her mom that she needed to wear a different pair of shoes to school.   According to her, the P.E. Teacher told her that her shoes were inappropriate for the playground, and made her sit out of P.E. that day.  As we pressed her a little further, suspecting she may have gotten the details a bit mixed up, I asked, “So if I were to call the teacher and ask her why she made you sit out, would she know what I was talking about?”

She stood there for a minute, thinking, and said, “Oh Wait!!!  That was someone who looks just like me!  It wasn’t me who had to sit out.”

Suddenly Mom & I realized we had been misled.  Time was escaping us, and dealing with lying would not be possible in this moment.  So later that afternoon, I sat with my daughter and we discussed why she felt the need to lie.  Tears began to flow, and as best as I could understand her answer, this is what she offered:  ”I had a lie down inside of me, and it just HAD to come out.”

Man, I wish I had thought of that one when I was a kid.

My girls were upstairs playing earlier this afternoon. Mom was napping on the couch, little Jay was taking an nap and I was watching my first college football game in a very long time.

My middle little girl came downstairs in search of a snack, so I helped her locate some chocolate chip cookies. Her face was all aglow with this nice little afternoon snack, and I thought it would be a sweet gesture for her to take a cookie upstairs for each of her sisters, so off she ran.

An hour or so later all three sisters came downstairs and the two that had been upstairs were now in search of an afternoon snack.

“You’ve already had a cookie,” I told the oldest one who suddenly looked at me with a very puzzled look on her face. “I didn’t get a cookie!” she replied. So I looked at the middle who insisted she put the cookie upstairs for her, and offered the thought, that she must not have seen it yet. So off the two of them went to find the missing cookie. Seconds later they came back without a cookie. Then the youngest one spoke up and said “I didn’t get a cookie either,” At which point I became suspicious of some foul play.

I turned to the middle Sis and asked, “Did you eat their cookies?” I could see that she was having the most difficult silent conversation with herself, and finally with tears bursting forth, and in words almost inaudible she confessed, “I DID! I DID EAT THEIR COOKIES. IM SUCH A BAD PERSON!”

Well she’s laying on her bed now. I’m gonna go talk to her about the importance of sharing, telling the truth, and the fact that she’s not a bad person. I just hope I can do it all with a strait face.

Guess temptation can come in all shapes and sizes even in the form of three chocolate chip cookies.

I’ve come realize that as the husband of a beautiful wife, four amazing kids, and the owner of a dog who challenges my patience, I have so many little life stories that need to be remembered. Many of them make me laugh, some of them make me cry, all of them I’ll want to remember years later.

So, don’t feel obligated to read, but simply indulge me as I commit these life moments to my virtual memory, as we continue to “Live The Dream.”

I’ve spent a lot of time this morning looking back over my life at the times God has blessed me.  Whether its been a word of encouragement, a prayer offered on my behalf, a financial need met, or a “just because,” I have been blessed so many times and didn’t really deserve any of them.  Sometimes, when blessings come its easy to take them for granted.  To cast a passing glance in their direction, to acknowledge them and go about life.  I don’t wanna be that way.  I want to return to say thanks.

So if you’re reading this, then thanks.  Thanks for taking the time to listen to my heart.  If you’ve prayed a prayer for me, thanks.  If you’ve sent me an email, a card, posted on my wall, or tweeted me a direct message to encourage me thanks.   If you’ve been my friend, even when I didn’t deserve it thanks.  If you’ve given me something, money, a gift, a meal, even a hard time, thanks.  I’m blessed, stronger, even a  better man because of you.  thanks.

When you finish reading this, why don’t you do something that may seem a little random to somebody else.  Why don’t you tell them thanks for something they’ve done for you?

Peace

Tonight my prayer is that I will not sleep comfortably in my bed until she sleeps comfortably in hers.

And God answered my prayer.  What a restless night.  In fact its 4 a.m and my alarm shouldn’t go off for another hour. and here I am wide awake  I tossed and turned and my dreams were so disturbing.

My first dream found me downtown, trying to warn people about a dreadful storm that was fast approaching.  I was screaming at people to take shelter.  Suddenly in my dream, I could see a monstrous funnel cloud approaching, and I was trying to get a lady, whose face I couldn’t see to safety.  She couldn’t move quickly, and I could hear her crying in fear, as the storm got close enough to completely destroy us, I woke up.

Later in another dream I had locked myself inside of a room, in what appeared to be a homeless shelter.  Someone was trying to break in the door to get me, so just before the door burst open, I climbed out the back window and went running for my life.

I’m disturbed.  And to some it may seem somewhat over-the-top.  But this is what I prayed for.  My heart is breaking for Mary.  I can’t imagine what it must be like to have no place to go, on days of extreme heat like yesterday, when the thermometer on my car read 100 degrees.  Or what about those afternoons when a heavy thunderstorm comes through?  Where does she go to stay dry, or safe.  She can’t run.  She can barely walk.  How does she find cover?  She told me a little yesterday about some of the places she’s stayed, and how she was beaten and robbed.  Yeah, robbed?  Robbed of what you may ask?  A blanket. a pair of shoes, a bag of food she had been given.  Even a walker!  Can you imagine?  Someone stealing a walker from someone who so desperately needs it?

I’m pulling bits and pieces of her story together.  I hope to document what I learn about her here.  At least until we find her a place to live permanently.  But for now, I will pray; pray for her protection and her provision.  And. . . I think I’ll swipe a pair of my wife’s socks this morning before I leave.  I know she won’t mind, and I know it’ll make Mary happy, after all that’s what she asked for yesterday.

Would you help me pray for Mary?  If you have suggestions on ways to help her, I’m open.  In the meantime, my prayer for you is that you too, will be impacted by the less fortunate around you.  More than that, I’m praying that you will be disturbed.

Disturb us, Lord, when
We are too well pleased with ourselves 
When our dreams have come true
Because we dreamed too little,
When we arrived safely
Because we sailed too close to the shore.

Disturb us, Lord, when
With the abundance of things we possess
We have lost our thirst
For the Waters of Life;
Having fallen in love with life, 
We have ceased to dream of eternity
And in our efforts to build a new earth,
We have allowed our vision
Of the new Heaven to dim.

Disturb us, Lord, to dare more boldly,
To venture on wider seas
Where storms will show your mastery:
Where losing sight of land
We shall find the stars.

We ask you to push back 
The horizons of our hopes;
And to push us in the future
In strength, courage, hope, and love.

- Francis Drake 1577

So there she was early that morning, and for a brief second I looked away only to be startled by the sound of a massive thud. I immediately realized that Mary had disappeared from sight, until I saw her frail body lying directly across the street from me.  I ran to her to find that she was alive but something was terribly wrong, she wasn’t responding to me at all.   I ran quickly to the store to call 911, and within seconds they were on the scene  As I ran back outside Mary was up walking around but she was severley disoriented walking aimlessly in the middle of the street as the flashing lights of fire trucks, police cars and ambulances surrounded her.

I’ll never forget the fear on her face as i tried to get her back to the sidewalk  The EMTs began to talk to her and I knew she was in good hands.  Apparently she had suffered a “grandma seizure.”

I see Mary just abouut everyday.  You see she’s been evicted from her government subsidized apartment, so she sleeps in the doorway just down the sidewalk from the coffee shop where I work.  Her address is a wooden bench, and her small bag of belongings sits just underneath.  She’s had several walkers, to give her mobility, but they are always stolen from her.

I spent a little time talking to Mary today.  She has one pair of clothes, stained with her own bodily fluids  She asked me if I could help her find a pair of socks.  She dreams of a bath, or at least a bar of soap she can use to clean up in a public restroom downtown.

Tonight as I lay my head on my soft pillow I see Mary’s face  Its burned into my mind.  Tonight my prayer is that I will not sleep comfortably in my bed until she sleeps comfortably in hers.

I don’t really know how to help Mary, but I’m praying for wisdom and direction.  I just know this . . . I can’t ignore her any more.

Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?
Or does anybody even know she’s going down today
Under the shadow of our steeple
With all the lost and lonely people
Searching for the hope that’s tucked away in you and me
Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?

-Casting Crowns

The last week of April 2011, will not soon be forgotten in my memories. The week began with a a beautiful Easter Sunday. Beautiful weather, fun with the family, lots of smiles, pictures, laughs, it was great.

Monday was back to work, making coffee for the under-caffeinated, and feeling absolutely wiped out from such an exhaustingly wonderful weekend. As my day came to an end at work, I was informed that a young man I had worked with for a couple of months at the coffee shop earlier last year, had unexpectedly passed away. I didn’t know the guy that well, but I had the opportunity to work with him on a number of occasions, and as I reflected over my time with him, I wondered if had done everything I could to be a source of hope in his life; had I cared enough about the things he was going through to actually pray for the guy? He was going through a lot at the time. Had I ever taken the opportunity to talk to him about the hope that I have in Christ, asking him to consider accepting that same hope? Sadly, I feel as though I missed one too many opportunities, and that was a hard reality to accept.

As the week progressed, it quickly became a week that would live on in infamy in the lives of many of my neighbors. Wednesday, brought some of the worst storms and tornados to hit the southeast in years. In the course of twelve hours three bands of strong storms hit our area, and while I watched from windows, and front porches, I saw green clouds, bands of swirling rain, thunder and lightning pass right in front of me and the extent of the affect of these storms on my family was a night without electricity. But as Thursday morning awoke, so did the reality of the devastation around us. Less than 3 miles from our house, a tiny little community, had been completely ransacked, and lives lost as a result of a tornado that pummeled through. Not more than 10 miles south of us, the little town of Ringgold where, my wife had grown up, and where we had lived for five years, was turned into rubble in a matter of seconds by an F4 tornado.

In the days that have followed, I’ve heard story after story of people who have lost their lives, loved ones who have not been heard from, families who have lost everything. Even this morning I received an email of a guy who lost relatives this week to the storms. I’ve heard the horrific of people being discovered in the most bizarre places, and the miraculous of people flying through the air in a bath tub and living to tell about it.

All of this has happened around us this week, and here I sit, in a comfortable chair, typing away on my iPad. And my greatest stress this morning is the fact that my hot water heater hasn’t worked for three days, and i’m on my second day without a shower (don’t judge me).

I’m so thankful for the fact that I’m alive today. I’m so thankful our house wasn’t damaged in the storms. I’m so thankful my family is safe and alive today. Im so thankful for so many things. But my thankfulness doesn’t eliminate my questions, of why? Questions for which I’ll never have the answers. But one thing I do not question today, is who?

I know that God is sovereign. I know that he knows what he’s doing. I know that he hurts with those who hurt today, and he grieves with those who grieve. I know that He is able to heal. I know that He is able to comfort. I know that my circumstances do not diminish his deity, though sometimes they may diminish my faith. I know he is merciful, loving, compassionate, caring, and kind. I know I can’t really make sense of it all. But I know Him, and that’s enough.